God Winks + Quiet

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We've been talking a lot about the balance of effort and surrender at Rock Your Bliss lately. Effort and surrender. Rest and play. Hustle and flow.

I realized I've been hustling pretty hard. Paperwork, classes, travel. I caffeinate myself into a frenzy then work as hard as a I can for short bursts. I've become addicted to the burst of "brought to you by coffee" energy, the excitement and reward of starting a new day. And if you know me, I don't do anything in moderation. (Hence why I've traded in the wine glass for the La Croix can for almost two years now.

This week I played with the idea of being as relaxed as possible while still productive. To breathe deeply, relax my jaw, break it up and go for a walk. The simple things that are so necessary yet beyond easy to forget.

As I got a little quieter I noticed my natural rhythms. Three hours back-to-back on the computer felt like too much. I needed water, tea and sunlight. (I'm basically a slightly caffeinated plant now.) My day felt longer and sweeter. I even needed a nap at one point. Which to exception of doing a couple of really spacey things, it's felt good. Like saying to myself: Oh, there you are. I missed you.

I truly believe that we create so much noise and chaos around and within us, we can't hear what the universe is trying to tell us. By dialing down the internal noise, I create more space. 

The sweetest moment happened yesterday. I felt drawn to read "A Tree Grows in Brooklyn." It's a very old book and a book my Grandma had told me was her favorite all throughout my childhood. I curled up with a tea and found myself lost in the book. Then realized that today is her birthday. My friend Rand calls these moments "God winks." I feel it.

So here's to God winks and quiet in 2018.