Honored to Be Here
For years I've had a weekly ritual: big mug of a tea or a glass of wine, my heart, my thoughts, my blog. And for the past year I let that go. There were a whole slew of reasons - creating my company Rock Your Bliss, diving head first into my classes and honestly I just didn't feel like it. I'm a big believer in respecting my own ebb and flow, otherwise I come across fakey and forced. Ew.
This past year I've learned some big things. Like..
To meet myself where I am. I've done a whole slew of challenges, from eating nothing but veggies and protein for thirty days (and I felt amazing...), to meditation, to juice, to even trying to be messier (more on that to come.) But what I'm finding I need most as of late is just a listening in. Currently meditation, Pilates and Amy Poehler's book are rocking my world. What feels like balance to you? It's a day to day kinda thing.
The importance of building a home. Jacki and I spent a whole lotta time on the road last year building our business. We taught in front of hundreds of people, sang Karaoke on a bar top in Truckee (though there was no actual Karaoke.. Improvisation!) and sat on a lot of planes/buses/automobiles. Come end of October and we were burnt out. I returned home to nest in it. I told Matt I wasn't going to go to teach at Wanderlust Australia and New Zealand for five weeks because I wanted to be here. Missed opportunity? Yeah, maybe. But at the end of the day my family and my home are the most important things to me in the world and I would've missed out on so much of that being gone.
That it's about practice not perfection. When I first started teaching yoga almost ten years ago I spent hours, and I mean hours, trolling over everyone else's website seeing what they were doing then either feeling defeated or jealous. It took me a few years (yes, really) to shift this and to realign my focus on what I love. My message as a 31 year-old woman is so much different than it was as a 21 year-old. (THANK GOD.) I love seeing my life practice through the lens of yoga and that's what I am learning, what I'm teaching, what I'm coaching on. As my mama always said, "Everybody is doing the best that they can." And well, I'm in charge of my best so I'm practicing. In my marriage, on my mat, in my conversations, in my interactions. I sometimes wish it to be easier or to be less accountable, but I just can't. The work is non-negotiable. And it's beautiful.
Thanks for letting me think and feel and put it here on a page. That's how I process, that's how I learn and I'm so very happy to be coming back home that.
I am honored to be here.